Thursday, March 28, 2013

Song of the Day: Thursday

Tonight I went to the Holy Thursday Mass in Chicago with friends. A good Mass. Beautiful, actually. But there was something missing for me.

This song popped into my head during Mass.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Song of the Day: Tuesday

Tonight I celebrated Passover with some friend and family, new friends. It was as good as it always is. Even better. It was nice to be surrounded by people who either got the Passover or who were excited to learn about and celebrate it--even though we mostly were Catholics together tonight.

I got a chance to talk to a young woman who converted to Judaism. She has a compelling story. And, in talking to her, I could see her reasoning for converting. It resonates some with my story; choosing a place to belong where you are accepted for yourself and where you can be at peace with God. I want that.

Anyway, this song kind of speaks to that conversation we had.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Song of the Day: Sunday

I've been moody today. I think I move through the day as if everything is fine when I know that I am not doing the best. There are these issues that bubble deep down inside that I should address, but I ignore them as much as I can.

I think the saddest thing was hanging out with my friend and her family. All of her children were home for the weekend and they were happy to see each other, even with all of their little quirks and the ways that their parents want some things different for them than what they have chosen. I don't really have that. And at dinner tonight, another friend brought over their 9 day old baby. And, I don't have that either.

These are the times when I think, maybe I shouldn't have broken up with that guy, then maybe I'd have someone. Or, maybe I shouldn't be so picky, then I'd be with one of those guys who was interested in me when I was growing up. These are ridiculous thoughts because who knows how well these relationships would have turned out. And, had I made those choices, would I be the person that I am now and have the friends and experiences that I currently have? Probably not.

Anyway, this song, seems appropriate for my moodiness.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Song of the Day: Friday

For the past few weeks I've been listening to flamenco. Specifically, I've been listening to Ojos de Brujo and the Gipsy Kings. My internet station generated other songs for me based on these two bands. And, it's been good. But in the middle of the week, I felt the need for a change.

I arrived at work on Wednesday and needed a change; this song was in my head. I love Juanes. just something about him and the way he sings speaks to me. When I selected Juanes, this song is the one my station played first. Maybe Pandora does know me....

Thursday, March 21, 2013

song of the day: thursday

Today hasn't been the most uplifting day. I had a medical appointment this morning. My practitioner asked a very direct and personal question that upset me. She wasn't mean; it just was an uncomfortable question.

At work I found out that I didn't get a grant that I applied for--one that I spent, maybe, too much time working on. I kinda feel like I wasted my time. And, since I was already on edge from the morning--like I had a headache all day because I needed to cry--it really pissed me off!

This is on top of it being abuse awareness week on a few blogs that I follow. Hearing how other people suffer just makes me angry. Really Really Angry!

This song seems appropriate.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Song of the Day: Wednesday

I had wine at work today. Interesting. We had a pinot gris, a cabernet sauvignon and a shiraz. The pinot Gris was a bit acidic. The cabernet sauvignon was a bit oaky. Ick! The Shiraz was okay, but a bit too warm, but good.

Nice to drink at work, but I had a headache a bit later. Not enough water or something.

Anyway, this song has been in my head. Damned commercial.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Song of the Day: Tuesday

i am moody today. something i read reminded me of someone who hurt me. i channeled it well. i stopped by the library to pick up some items. i came home and wrote a poem. then, i worked out. it felt good to sweat; it felt good to move my body and stretch and push myself past what i thought i could or wanted to do. i want this to be my way of caring for myself when i am hurting. it's better than gorging on junk food. although junk food has a special place in my heart.

I've been singing this song since I got home. it reminds me of this song by Alanis Morissette. It's been a strange mash-up in my head. Good for letting out pent-emotions.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Song of the Day: St. Patrick's Day

Today I spent St. Patrick's Day with my friend L. I kindly invited myself over for a St. Paddy's Day meal. As did another friend. L made it into a small dinner party.  We had corned beef, cabbage, Guinness onion soup, Colcannon made with kale, Irish soda bread, salad, and chocolate mousse for dessert. So good!!! Afterward, I sat around and talked to the family--especially L.

This song is on my mind.

Song of the Day: Friday

For the past couple of days, I've been thinking of this song. I woke up singing it and sang it during my morning ritual until I left for work. How Weird!!! 

I found it ironic that, while watching one of my shows, this song popped up.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Song of the Day: Thursday

I'm feeling a bit down. Today is one of those days where I've been sabotaging myself. I went vegan for lent. But, it's Pi day so I brought pie to my colleagues at work. And then I had some pie. I am feeling the effects even now.

It may take me some time to recover. There's a reason I'm eating vegan. Dairy causes migraines and I'm lactose intolerant. I got a headache a bit after eating pie. Ugh!

Anyway, this song is a lullaby for me as I comfort myself through this bout of self-sabotage. I love the Dixie Chicks. This is my kind of country.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Song of the Day: Wednesday

Today is a good day for Catholics: we have a Pope!

I am excited. He's a Latin American Jesuit with a heart for the poor. He chose his name in honor of St. Francis of Assisi.

Sounds great! But already the murmuring has already begun. One of which is that he might be to intellectual to be relatable.

When I heard this statement, this song came to mind. I love Bonnie Raitt and how appropriate as our theme song for this Papacy!

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Song of the Day: Tuesday

Today was a rough day. I woke up at 5am. Kinda nice because I could check on my lunch that was simmering in the slow cooker. But it was also not the best since I had trouble getting back to sleep. I listened to an evening meditation cd that lulled me to sleep. Afterward I turned on NPR very, very quietly in the background and fell asleep. The next thing I knew, it was after 9am and I was about to be late for work.

I quickly got up, got dressed, packed my lunch and jetted to work. As I was about to park, I realized that it was Tuesday. On Tuesday mornings I don't go straight to work. I go to my allergist first. So I turned around and showed up late for my standing appointment. I went to work afterwards.

I didn't stay at work. I went home early. I was having trouble staying awake so I decided to do that at home rather than work.

This song seems both appropriate and ironic at the same time.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Song of the Day: Monday

This song is in my head. Feel good 80s music with big hair is a good way to end the day.

Especially since I'm a bit apprehensive because the College of Cardinals go into the Conclave to choose a Pope. Who knows what will happen in there or what the result will be. So instead I will focus on a baby-faced Axl Rose.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Song of the Day: Sunday

Today has been a calm day. I woke up with the urge to do laundry and dishes--after I adjusted all of my clocks. I stayed in, avoiding the weather. I called my grandmother and had a short and frustrating conversation. And my friend V called tonight.

All evening I've had this song in my head.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Song of the Day: Saturday

Today I spent the day with L. We started by walking her dog. We then went shopping before going back to her house. I promptly began cooking for Ladies' Night part II.

A came over to join us. We had West African Peanut Soup over rice and Frozen Sangria. We watched "A Walk in the Clouds" and "Happy Feet." Tonight was my first time watching "Happy Feet" and though A and L were very loud and obnoxious during the viewing, I really enjoyed it. I want to see it again--without the chatter.

Since watching that movie, this song is in my head. Although in the movie, it's a bit different. Either way it's Prince and this is a good thing.

Friday, March 8, 2013

Song of the Day: Friday

Tonight my friend L called Ladies' Night. Her other half is out of town for the next week so we all congregated for dinner and drinks--really strong tequila, triple sec, and lime juice also known as Margartitas.

Dinner was great. Soft tacos. They had Shrimp and spinach with the fixins. For me, vegan's delight: Lentils and potatoes with tomatoes; pickled carrots, jalapenos, and garlic; tofutti sour cream; peanuts; and, a bit of cayenne. Everything was served on a tapioca tortilla. Nice and Yummy!

Anyway, this song seemed appropro since the call went out. (Sorry about the plaid outfit!!!) Luckily, tonight was just round one!

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Song of the Day: Wednesday

Wednesday was a good day. I got lots of sleep on Tuesday night. I felt really good, but groggy--like I could have slept much longer--when I woke up in the morning. And the day felt good, if long.

This song stuck with me throughout the day. I know it as a Buena Vista Social Club song, but I like how different the Gipsy Kings version is.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Song of the Day: Tuesday

On Tuesday, I started feeling spacey and queasy. Sleeplessness does that to me. So, I came home, worked out, showered, had dinner and passed out around 9:30pm. I woke up some time in the night to turn off the bedside lamp and didn't wake again until morning. I't was about 7:30am when I turned on NPR, but I was awake long before that. It felt good to sleep and I still felt a little sticky--like I couldn't lift myself from the mattress--when I got up at 8:45am to get ready for work. I spent about half an hour digging my car out from the snow.

Anyway, when I got home from work, my downstairs neighbors were playing this song. Pretty cool! And, definitely glad I wasn't trying to sleep while it was on. I used to think this was CeeLo. Glad to be corrected.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Song of the Day: Monday

I stayed home today. I didn't get much sleep last night. Saturday night I fell asleep for good around 8:30, after falling asleep watching a half-hour show that I'd DVRed; I woke up a couple of times during the night, but didn't wake up for good until 7:30am. I thought I was just catching up on sleep. So, when I went to sleep last night, I did not anticipate still being awake at 4am.

I read as is usual for my bedtime routine. And when I laid down, sleep would not come; actually I felt myself jerking awake whenever I started to drift off. I eventually turned on the radio since that sometimes puts me to sleep. BBC was on. Next thing I know, it's about 8:30am and I haven't slept well.  

I stayed home to try to catch up on some sleep, but I couldn't sleep. Again! I ate, showered, changed the sheets on my bed and watched a bit of telly. I also read.

So, tonight I hope to get some decent sleep. I am hoping that I am not in my insomnia phase. It would suck if I am since I am not the nicest person when I don't get enough sleep.

So, today's song: Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge. Not sure why I've never posted it on here, but it was in my head today.

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Song of the Day: Sunday

Tonight has been a night. I spent a bit of time thinking and praying, crying and mourning.

On Monday, the College of Cardinals of the Roman Catholic Church will convene to begin discussion about the issues that the Church is facing and what the Church needs in a Pope. After their discussion, they will eventually select our next Pontiff. Until then we are Pope-less (Sede Vacante).

For my part, I am partially optimistic. I am hopeful that our next pope will address the scandals that have rocked the Church--mainly the child abuse and cover up. I really want to see the Church and its leadership do right by the children who were harmed. I want an apology. I want changes. I want it made right. So that nothing like this ever happens again: the abuse or the priest shuffle and ass-covering.

But the cynical side of me is not holding my breath. I know that the kinds of things that need to happen to begin to address the harm done will tear apart the Church in such a way it will take a while rebuild. Not to say that we should protect the Church over children. I would never, ever say or imply something as wicked as that. But, I am realistic about how hierarchy works. It will take some deep honesty and humility to activate the root-level change that needs to happen. Considering how things have been handled so far, I am not at all hopeful.

So how does one respond when one's Church does not live up to the ideals upon which it was founded? I am not free to leave yet. I have no place to go; no other place where I'd want to worship. But without change, I cannot see myself raising children in such an environment. And, while I know that the I would be raising a family in a local Church where I would have more oversight, I am still not quite willing. Some of it is that I don't want to commit myself on that level; but I am not yet free to leave.

This heartbreak song, seems somewhat appropriate for my current angst. It helps that it's Adele. She's quite good at communicating so much emotion with they turn of a phrase.

Song of the Day: Saturday

Yesterday I went for a walk and ran errands with my friend L. She is outspoken and rowdy like I like my friends. She took me to one of the best crack stores in town. It helps that my money goes to a good cause but I now have a philanthropic excuse for buying books that I don't need. I did well, though. I bought 6 books for just over $9 (I got a 10% educator discount). Not too shabby!

While out and about, I subjected L to the Wicked soundtrack. She and her husband are going to see it here on opening night. And, she doesn't like Kristin Chenoweth. Something about her speaking voice and the strange juxtaposition between her and Adele at the Oscars: Kristin is about 4'11' in stocking feet and Adele, who unshod is about 10'" taller and carrying post-pregnancy weight. I had to do my best to make her like the original Glinda. Didn't work and she'd heard the soundtrack before.

This is my favorite song on the soundtrack. Every time I hear it, I tear up. I think it touches something in me, this desire to move beyond the limits other people set for you, to exceed all expectations for yourself. The waterworks generally begin at "So if you care to find me...." And, it seems not to matter who is singing the words, although my preference is Idina Menzel.

Friday, March 1, 2013

Song of the Day: Friday

On the way home tonight I was listening to the 80s station.  This song came on, reminding me of my teenaged years. Alex from "Family Ties' falling in love. I think it was even in "Roadhouse." Luckily the song survived being in such a crappy movie.